Takashi Shinkiro(Done)

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Takashi Shinkiro(Done)

Post by Takashi Shinkiro on Wed Nov 20, 2013 4:41 pm

Takashi Shinkiro

Name: Takashi Shinkiro
Gender: Male
Age: 19
Sexuality: Straight
Alignment: Chaotic Good

Guild: Fairy Tail
Class: S Rank

Appearance

Height: 5'11
Weight: 145 lbs
Eye Color: Brown
Hair color/style: Short and Spiky/Orange
Extra: N/A

Overall Appearance: Takashi's most distinguishing feature is his spiky orange hair. He is a fairly tall, lean-built young man with peach skin and brown eyes. He wears a white undershirt beneath his black shihakushō, which is now open. Held together by three "x"-shaped marks, it ends in a number of coattails. Takashi wears black gloves, with white "x"-shaped marks appear on both the gloves and his forearms, these are considered his battle clothes. Normally he can be seen wearing a black and red track jacket with black and red track shorts, these are his normal clothing. He also has a pair of clothes that he trains in. The outfit consist of black shorts and a white tee shirt. Takashi cared greatly about his appearance as he thought appearance was everything. He walks with confidence and pride standing and sitting straight up at all time. When Takashi walks he usually holds both arms to his side with his hands in his pocket. Takashi can be seen with one of three facial expression, one is a scowl which usually means he is concentrating and has nothing to do with his emotions or feelings. The second facial expression is a smile, the smile is what is usually seen by the people around Takashi. The final expression is nothing but a plain blank face, which Takashi uses as a sort of poker face to hide everything he is thinking or feeling. His style of dressing is a sort of dressy-casual wearing thinks such as a plain button up shirt and jeans will not wearing one of the outfits above. When he is wearing other than his battle clothes he is seen wearing a pair of all black aviators. He finds his style of dressing is the best of both worlds as it doesn't make him look like he is trying to be better than common people, but it also makes him somewhat looks like he comes from a noble house. The features that stands out most about Takashi is his orange hair and his dark brown sparkling eyes, girls many times say his eyes remind them of a hot relaxing mud bath. When not in the midst of battle Takashi cares greatly about his appearance and tries to stay neat and clean at all time, which is to be expected of someone from a noble family. Even with the previous statement Takashi will not care too much if his clothes get dirty
Battle Clothes:
Normal Clothes:
Face Claim: Ichigo Kurosaki - Bleach

Persona

Likes: Friends- Takashi feels likes friends are his second family and will do almost anything for them. The extent to what he will do goes as far as willing to die for them. He takes friends as a second family that he can go to for any and everything just like he does his real family and believes that for some people they are better than their real family. Takashi cares about having friends more than anything because he believes friends are power.
Magic- Takashi likes learning about different types of magic and takes great interest in learning everything about them. With Takashi being highly intelligent he has dedicated part of his life to magical research, meaning he wants to use his knowledge of magic to make new magics and improve on old ones
Socializing-Takashi likes to talk to people and thinks talking is better than fighting. He believes than any problem from family to business and even to possible war can be solved simply by having a nice conversation.
Swordsmanship- Takashi is a greats swordsman but does it mostly as a hobby. He spent countless days in his youth training in swordsmanship and has become a master with it
Family- Takashi is greatly influenced by his family and loves them all very much. Unlike his friends he treats his family like royalty almost as if they weren't related to him and he was a peasant. He believes he owes everything to his family and believes they are responsible for everything he is including his power, fame, and wealth.
Spicy food- Takashi likes foods that are more spicy than sweet but enjoy food where it is both sweet and spicy
Technology- With such a high level of intelligence Takashi s skilled with any forms of technology and is also able to fix and create them. His true passion currently is finding a way to combine technology and magic to much greater extremes
Strategy Games- To some strategy games can be boring but Takashi likes them a lot because they stimulate the mind and keep the senses sharpened

Dislikes: Spiders- Takashi is terribly afraid of spiders. This fear is caused because one got into his ear when he was young and almost had to be surgically removed.
People who mistreat their allies- Takashi thinks that your allies should be treated like they are the greatest and should never be mistreated, as they are the source of a person's true strength
Heart break- Takashi is in touch with his emotions and can be very heart broken if he loses the woman he loves
Not being able to protect friends and family- He wants to protect the people close to him no matter what the cost even if that cost is his life
Food that's very sweet- Takashi thinks food with too much sugar or sweetness is terrible and should be forbidden
Abuse of power- Takashi is a great believer that those with high amounts of power regardless if its physical, magical, or mental have to help mold the world for the next generation
Overly Silly People- Takashi knows how to have fun and a sense of humor but he believes people should know when to and when not to be silly. When people don't know how to do this it drives Takashi to instantly dislike them and find them annoying

Motivation: Takashi has one true goal and that is to make a team of some very powerful mages to help him make his family more powerful, this team would be known as the knights of the round. This team will consist of 13 powerful mages under Takashi's and the Shinkiro family's rule. A secondary goal of his is to join the magic council and become the chairman of it, this would also boost his family's power and standing throughout the country.
Fears: Losing a close friend- He cares deeply about his friends and will give his own life to ensure they keep their's. He wants his friends more than anything to be safe and well
Giant Spiders- Just like he fears normal sized spiders he fears their giant magical counterparts that live in the forest and swamps and tries to avoid them due to his childhood incident
Mugetsu- Although Mugetsu is Takashi's strongest spell and is far stronger than what its rank suggest he fears its massive amounts of power and the price that comes with it. He fears losing his powers and refuses to use the last phase of Mugetsu unless its completely needed such as for his survival or the survival of Fairy Tail as a whole. The only exception to this rule is when it concerns his family or its assets as he owes them everything.

Overall Personality: As known by many of his friends and rivals alike, Takashi both a rather calm person. He gives off a rather mellow disposition, not getting truly mad very often, unless his mom is involved. Being born into the noble Shinkiro home caused him to have this mostly lax persona as his childhood years were stressful and hard. He feels as though now that he has more control over his life he doesn't have to stress anymore like he used to.

Before and after Takashi gets to know people he is usually very friendly and giving basic to average information about himself or his family pretty openly. Takashi is also a very private person and only shares a big chunk of beyond average information to his close circle which includes his family and some members of Fairy Tail, and anyone else he wishes to be in it. When talking about certain heavy subjects Takashi loses his lax persona and gets a very dark and brooding one and can switch between them in a blink of the eye.

Takashi holds a love for fighting people of great power; yet he never likes fighting those who lack in abilities, saying "it's troublesome and unfair". Although he doesn't truly doesn't like fighting unless truly needed, although he does find sparring ok. Even when pressured by strong enemies, he showed no emotional build up. When in combat, he keeps himself level-headed and calm, believing one has lost the battle if he cannot keep his composure; and he believes in ending battles quickly, though it's obvious whenever Takashi is excited, given his usually calm disposition. Takashi simply tries to avoid being hit the first few minutes of a fight so that he may study his opponent. He will then come with his own attacks and hopefully quickly end the fight with the info he gathered.

In spite of his calm and relaxed state of mind, Takashi has a strong sense of justice. To the degree that he will take missions involving the crushing of dark guilds, believing they cannot be given the chance to hurt the innocent. Though this strong stance on dark guilds and evil somewhat contradicts with his lax persona. Due to such a strong sense of justice he has been called chaotic good by many people because he usually doesn't care what means he uses to get to the end. An example of this was when he took down the dark guild know as Shining Dragon, Takashi went undercover into the guild and in his time undercover he killed at least 4 people. But the end result was him destroying the dark guild. He was also the one to kill his father when his father asked him to because he would no longer suffer from his illness. Many people may come to dislike him because he isn't pure good.

His state of mind is pretty dark and maniacal. Although he is a good person he has another half that can be seen as evil although any and all evil acts come from good intentions. He believes that when evil is too strong you must stain your hands with evil to defeat evil. His two very distinct sides and his tactical mind give him great leadership skills. His quick thinking make it easy for him to do large and small scale battles. While his two sides keep him level headed and able to make tough decisions. The hardest decision he made was if he wanted to kill his father when he was on his deathbed. Even with such a hard choice he made a good decision. Takashi doesn't do very well as a follower and is very displeased when he thinks he isn't in at least some form of leadership position within the guild, group, or team. When Takashi is forced to take a follower role he is very very dominant. This means he wants someone to prove they are stronger than him before he will just follow them without him having a excellent reason.

Takashi although very kind and friendly has many inner conflicts with himself. The main conflict is the fact he has to different mind sets. One being dark and the other being all good. Even though the dark side does things for the cause of good he still feels both of these sides tugging at him at some points. Another conflict is the one between his family and magic. His family wants him to come help run the business side of his family but he wants to be a mage and magical researcher. The only reason this is a thought in his mind is because he believes he owes his family for everything he is.

Ever since his childhood, Takashi has always been known to be a clever and very perceptive individual. Behind his piercing brown eyes is an analytical mind that is quick to adapt and deal with any strenuous situation. While his physical capabilities were exceptional without question, his mind was also one of his greatest weapons. Takashi always takes anything of value into account. From his opponent's quirks to changes in mood or mentality. To him, one can read their opponents next moves based on their state-of-mind and habits. Also, he places a high importance on a person's analytical prowess. In overall Takashi can be summed up as a genius tactician. This came from many years of playing strategy games as a child. Many people such as his mother would note how they disliked how he always thought about things so far in advance. His father would even hit him with spells when Takashi told him how to make decisions for Fairy Tail.

Contrary to his kind self, Takashi does not have any apprehensions to killing enemies. If someone is a threat to his well being, he can take their lives without a second thought. Some call this a case of being desensitized to killing, however, Takashi takes it for what it is, doing what's necessary to survive in an efficient manner. As a result, Takashi has killed scores of men, more specifically, criminals of all kinds, in self defense over the course of his career as a mage, starting from his late teens. He believes that a person who is too scared to kill their enemy is a fool as you never know what could happen. It is rare for him to let a powerful enemy live following defeating them. Takashi once killed a whole guild of dark mages which included woman and children because he knew they were evil with bad intentions.

His ambitions are clear. Whether it be enemies, rivals, daily trials, nothing can get in his way. Takashi is incredibly loyal to those he calls his friends or guildmates. He is also willing to give his life for his friends and guildmates if it means they can live. He is willing to help his friends in any way that he can. He easily makes friends with the people he is around enough and is a true flirt when he is single. When he is in a relationship he is very faithful, loving, and caring. He usually will spend a majority of his time around his partner although not in a clingy fashion. He feels as though couples who spend time together and grow a genuine bond will be a lot better off than one that is set up. Such as when Takashi's parents tried to arrange him to marry a girl from another noble family. The relationship they had was terrible and the marriage was soon passed to his younger brother because of it.

When it comes to food Takashi is not picky at all. He rather enjoys eating inside next to a window that way he can enjoy the view while he eats or gets entertained. He doesn't enjoy overly sweet food and finds it disgusting. He dislike it so much he thinks it should be forbidden. Although he doesn't like sweet food he likes spicy food greatly. He also thinks that when you mix sweet and spicy it can be bearable. When he eats its in a very mannerly way as he comes from a noble family and was heavily taught how to act like a noble. If he ate in any other way other than with great manners in the presence. To completely sum up Takashi he is a kind,sweet, friendly, relaxed, and genius guy.

History

History: The House of Shinkiro also known as the "Shinkiro Family", is an illustrious, highly influential, and powerful family that for many generations has had a had in all things throughout Fiore magical and business. The family is known for its' legendary members and almost all supreme leaders of the guilds and factions they were in. A defining trait of this family is that many of its' descendants are born with a high aptitude for the magical arts and abnormally strong magical power. They are the most respected noble family among the commoners of Fiore, due to their charity and philosophy of treating all equally. Fame, Wealth, Power this family has all this and more. The House of Shinkiro stands at the top as one of the most powerful families in both Fiore and the world. It is important to understand that much of the privileges enjoyed by the members of the family are owed to their predecessors. Aside from making strides in the world of magic, many great Shinkiro men and women have been powerful businessmen, doctors, government officials, and even accomplished architects.The Shinkiros are a very public and outgoing family; not ones to hide within the confines of their palatial estates. They are the ones who are out there doing things, big and small. From volunteer work to holding public charity events on the lawns of the Shinkiro Manor, they are a rather open family.

Takashi was born into the extremely esteemed and wealthy Shinkiro family. He is the first son of the head of the Shinkiro family, Damon Shinkiro. His parents Damon and Shanice had 15 kids, 7 boys and 8 girls. In order from youngest to oldest they had Denetrice, Tina, Zoey, Takashi, Ishimaru, Jordan, Damon Jr, Ann, Aliyah, Jaimee, Gilbert, Lance, Dayna, Ashley, and Josiah. Ishimaru was his twin brother and the two were almost inseparable. Damon was the previous guildmaster of Fairy Tail and as such it was expected that Takashi would take the position when his father stepped down. Sadly this was not the case. At a young age Takashi was highly intelligent and overall talented. He was intelligent to the point he could play word games and and such things that were mad for people between the ages of 10 and 13. Over the following years Takashi trained and sparred with many people such as his father, grandfather, and all his brothers and sisters. Takashi and his twin brother Ishimaru would regularly represent the kids of their family when it came time to give their opinion. The two brothers would regularly go to the Fairy Tail guildhall hanging around their father's office, so they are well known by the older members. The two were loved by them and even having the female mages call them "Too cute" and "Boyfriend". Around the age of 8 Takashi and Ishimaru joined Fairy Tail when their father was still Guildmaster. They were recognized as prodigies and were also highly respected by the guild's most powerful mages. His great strength and power came from his family's bloodline. All members of the Shinkiro family were known to be very strong and powerful.

Takashi as the first born son of the head of the family, was taught everything from how to run the family business to how to act mannerly in a way that befit a noble. When he was young he submitted to the harsh and stressful grooming that his family forced on him. He was often teased by his 3 older sisters for being so naive and submissive to their parents. But none the less Takashi acted as a true noble should and did everything according to his parents wishes. Due to the fact he did everything they asked Takashi became his parents favorite and stayed that way even after they had more kids.

As the youngest member of Fairy Tail Takashi would strive to do harder than everyone in the guild. Takashi developed a dark side to his personality due to a awful accident that occurred when he was on a mission. When he was out with a older member of Fairy Tail known as Franklin. When on the mission Takashi was being a show off and wasn't listening to Franklin. Due to this disobedience Franklin lost his life to an enemy who attacked them from behind. Takashi in an attempt to save Franklin killed the man after he cut Franklin all the way down his back. That was the first time Takashi ever had to kill someone and the event is what made Takashi have such a dark side to him. His father punished him greatly when he returned from the mission but the pain of killing and watching his friend die hurt more.

When Takashi turned 14 he was put up to take the S rank exam along with 2 other mages of Fairy Tail by his father. The S rank exam was very tough. Takashi inevitably failed the exam and didn't advance. Takashi was shamed by his loss and lost the respect of everyone in his family especially his father. His father then sent him away to train his magic elsewhere that way he would have less distractions and pass his S rank exam next time. When Takashi arrived at his new home his teacher Master Krand was very relaxed and almost always happy. Takashi was very stuck up and stressed back then so their personalities and way of thinking clashed greatly. Before Master Krand would even think about training Takashi he forced the boy to learn the meaning of relax and lower his stress.

It took Takashi many months before he would loosen up and live a more stress free and relaxed life. Once he was more relaxed Krand made a promise to Takashi that he would teach him three magics in 3 years as long as he kept his new found relaxed personality. Takashi agreed to the promise and they then began to train so that Takashi would learn the 3 new magics. Before the true training would begin Krand made the boy do silly tedious task such as requip simple clothing. While this task proved easy they got harder and harder. For his final pre-test Takashi had to beat Krand at a strategy game. Takashi failed this test for 4 months. He learned that in order to beat your opponent that you must study them and everything about them even if you only get a few seconds you must remember everything you see. After he learned that he beat Krand and his real training began.

The 3 magics that Krand was gonna teach Takashi were Fallen, Six Mages of Origins, and Heavenly Body. Out of the three magics the first Takashi picked to learn was Fallen. Fallen was a dark magic of the highest caliber but it was very powerful in the fact that it wasn't weak against light/holy magic. It took Takashi 6 months to learn Fallen which half of that time was spent learning how to have it not consume him with its darkness. Takashi had know been in training with Master Krand for 2 years and had 2 years left to learn the other magics. The next magic up was the Six Mages of Origin, which was a different and special type of summoning magic. The magic was made so that the user could pick a vessel to embody the spirit of one of the six original mages. Takashi had many troubles summoning the mages and even more troubles getting them to listen to him. When he was training and finally was able to summon their spirits he would place them into practice dummies and within a year and 9 months he had learned how to completely control and summon the mages.

Krand had grown heartbroken as he thought he had broken his promise to Takashi about teaching him 3 magics in 3 years. Krand thought it was impossible for the young now 17 year old boy. For his last remaining months at the facility with Master Krand, Takashi worked all day and all night researching Heavenly Body magic greatly. He would stay up almost all day and night and would only sleep about 3 hours everyday. When the 3 months were up and it was time for Takashi to return home his teacher Krand was surprised to learn that he mastered Heavenly body within the matter of that time. He was surprised by this and was happy to call Takashi his student. Master Krand and his teachings of living a relaxed and stress free life would forever change Takashi's life, thus giving him part of the personality he has now.

Takashi had returned home by his 18th birthday using the other spare months traveling around the world. After returning home to the guild he was welcomed with open arms but realized that his father was no longer guildmaster. After meeting the new guild master by the name of Tsukiya Ishida, they quickly became friends and Tsukiya informed Takashi that his father was very ill. This confused Takashi greatly but he then found out that his father was truly sick with a magical illness known as Pensia. Pensia would eat away at the magical power of the victims until they would have a very slow and painful death. Takashi went to his father on his deathbed where he would spend most of his nights with him hoping he would get better. Takashi was in a great state of denial until he received a wake up call from his father, Damon asked his first born son to kill him so that his suffering would end and he would move on and rest in peace. Takashi fulfilled his father's request and killed him. This was another event that helped develop Takashi's dark side and made him not concerned about killing.

After his father's death his family and all of Fairy Tail were upset and sad but Takashi threw himself into his magical studies. He began to studying how to create new magics. The magic Takashi was trying to create was to be based off of Fairy Glitter, only it was made to be far more powerful and complex. When his magic was still in its beginning phases he was forced to stop its creation and help his mother run the business aspect of their family. Takashi's new found lax persona was a terrible fit for his new position as CEO of Shinkiro Inc. Before he could leave his position his mother had arranged a marriage for him. The girl Takashi was to marry was Leah Sharano the daughter of a rival yet not as large industry. The marriage was called off just as quickly as it was arranged due to the fact Takashi dislike the girl a lot due to their obvious clashes in their personalities. He soon after gave up the position of CEO giving it to his uncle Chris, who was his father's older brother.

After leaving the company Takashi continued to try to create his new magic. The spell had many problems in its creatin with the main one being enough magic to power it. To solve this problem Takashi did research in order to find a way to maintain the spell. He found logs of old spells that would use everything but all your magical power to sustain it. The end result being barely enough power to live and the user going into a coma for several days. Takashi implemented this method of drawing power into the spell and gave birth to one of the most powerful magics in recorded history. The unnamed spell was far more powerful and taxing on the user than Takashi could imagine when he attempted to use it but failed. He then went back to the drawing board where he would then "split" the spell into 4 different phases, with each phase up stronger than the last. The final phase was called exactly that because if and when Takashi were to use it he would lose his magic. He promised himself that under no circumstance would he push past stage 3 of Mugetsu.

After the 3 months it took him to create and perfect Mugetsu, it was time once again for the S rank exam. Takashi was more than hyped for it as he knew for a fact that he would not fail this time as he did in the past. This year's exam included Takashi and 3 other mages by the names of Jessica, Raethy, and Kendall. The exam had 3 rounds where one of the 4 would be eliminated each round. The first round was a test of endurance, this was tested by seeing who could run the longest throughout Magnolia. The first round last 20 hours with Jessica losing and Kendall winning. The second round was a test of intelligence where the 3 remaining mages played a 3 way strategy game. The round ended with Takashi winning and Kendall losing. The 3rd and final round was a one on one fight where the winner would advance to S rank and the loser would have to wait till next year to retry. The battle between Raethy and Takashi was a fierce one but Takashi was sadly losing quite bad. It took him halfway through the fight to realize that he had people dead and alive counting on him to win. Takashi than explained to Raethy that he wouldn't lose for that reason and used up all the magic he had left to cast Phase 3 of Mugetsu. The spell heavily injured Raethy but she recovered. She was happy that Takashi put his all into that fight and thought that he deserved to win completely.

A state of peace loomed over Takashi and Fairy Tail until the ultra powerful mage known as Suza and his guild Seven Guardians of Hell appeared. The guild had waged war with Fairy Tail and it was a slow war indeed. They had went back and forth fighting for a month until finally a full all out fight happened. The seven guardians were defeated leaving nobody but their leader Suza. Takashi and the guildmaster of Fairy Tail Tsukiya fought with the man, but due to Tsukiya recklessness he was defeated leaving Takashi to fight him alone. The battle was completely one sided as Takashi was being tossed left and right all throughout Magnolia. None of his guildmates dared to jump in as they didn't wanna get in his way. But suddenly Kendall, Raethy, and Jessica came to his aide. The three mages once rivals to Takashi distracted Suza long enough for Takashi to regain some of his power. He then told the three that he could handle the fight from then on.

Takashi activated phase one of Mugetsu and the playing field slowly but surely got more leveled. As it continued to carry on he activated stage 2. At that point all of Fairy Tail began to regain hope and faith that they would come out on top. The second phase of Mugetsu soon lost its effectiveness meaning it was time for phase 3. Takashi strikes quick and fast with the third phase and the fight finally became evenly matched, but even wasn't good enough as Takashi soon activated the final phase. When he activated it the whole guild grew silent as they saw how the sky drastically changed and how Takashi's appearance changed. His short orange hair had turned black and he had Fallen magic energy spiral all around him. With one swift hand raise to the sky a sword made of complete darkness forms in Takashi's hand and as he brings his hand down a wave of magic falls down from the sky and explodes when it hits Suza. The form soon after disappeared and Takashi passed out.

It was several months and Takashi was now 19 but he was still fast asleep in his coma. Several days after his birthday Takashi began to wake up with all his magic and felt 100% healthy. When he had woke up he was informed he had been in a coma for 3 months. Upon waking up he remember all the events that leaded up to his slumber. Takashi was then known as a hero throughout Fairy Tail and Fiore. To this day Takashi still is a loyal and active member in Fairy Tail. He is also trying to form a team of powerful mages like him to help him destroy the constant dark guild threat.

RP Sample:
RP Sample 1:
Takashi was back at it again about to go out on another mission. He was tasked with another easy mission similar to the last one. Instead of getting a boy to come out his room he was tasked with delivering a piece of candy to a expidition group out in the woods. Takashi had left his house in Hosenka and headed to meet the man who had the candy. It was a beautiful day outside and Takashi was wearing his hood and cloak. He made his way down the streets of Hosenka looking for the man as he only knew him by face. As he finally found the man Takashi had approached him but the man simply threw a briefcase at him and ran off. Takashi was in a bit of shock at how shady the man was but he just shrugged it off and continued with the mission. Takashi took out a pair of handcuffs and locked himself to the brief case.  This was to ensure that he got the taffy to the team safely. He had began to walk the opposite way to the city gate so that he may head out to the woods. Long before he even got the the city gates he had been attacked by a flock of birds. Takashi tried to shoo tham off using his hands but had very little success. He then began to run away from the birds as fast as he could. The chase had gotten so intense Takashi had ducked off into a building to wait them out. After about 10 minutes the birds had cleared out. Takashi went back outside and began to walk back towards the city gates. After walking for about 10 minutes he had reached the gates. He then left the city and headed towards the woods. After walking for all of 5 minutes the flock of birrds came back after Takashi only difference was there was no buildings in to hide in this time. He continously ran away from the birdse. Suddenly he jumped into a bush to hide but then there was a small noise next to him. The small noise was a giant boar next to him. The boar was attracted to the candy Takashi had. Along with the born there were a swarm of wolves chasing after Takashi too, and lets not forget the birds. Takashi began to run at what seemed like lightning speed as he was scared for his life. He was running very quickly but it seemed like it wasn't enough to get away from the creatures. Eventually the creatures grew tired of running afte Takashi and he continued to run in hopes that they would never catch up. Night had fallen and their was no sign of the team Takashi began to set up camp so that he could sleep for the night. Takashi sat there with the brief case locked to him thinking about the candy. As Takashi fell asleep someone took the case from him. When he woke up he was vry surprised to see it gone. He looked all around his camp site for it but came up with nothing. He then began to use his inteligence to track it down using fot prints. He followed the footprints to a cave not to far away. After he entered the cave he found the case which had not been opened. He instantly went to grab the case but out of the shadows came out a baby volcan. Takashi had never faced a vulcan, and in fact wasn't used to fighting real opponents as all his training came from magic school where there is no real danger. A lot of his mage friends made fun of hims for that but he never let it stop him. As he looked at the vulcan he knew it was a baby but he still had plans to show it no mercy. He held his fist in the ar where a bright red and white light gathered around his fist and he yelled out "Fist of the Phoenix" he then punched the vulcan square in the jaw. The vulcan went flying back into the wall, which gave Takash the chance to quickly grab the breifcase. He then ran out the cave and continued on his mssion. He was almost at the midway point between Hosenka and Oak town. It was about noon and it was about to start pouring down rain. As it began to rain Takashi began to move off the road and back into the woods. He soon quickly was attacked by by more birds Takashi soo got quickly annoyed by the birds. Even in the rain they were still a big problem. At one point Takashi said fuck the birds and just allowed them to follow him. The birds actually seemed quite friendly towards Takashi as he began to talk to them in a friendly manner. After about an hour of walking through the rain with his bird friends around him  he had caught up with the team he was to be delivering the candy to. He asked the first lady he saw "Hey miss im the mage from Infinity Hydra I have the caandy in this case so who do I take this to? Or can I just hand it to you and go back home?" The young woman smiled at Takashi and said "Sure I can take that from you and you will recieve your payment from my employers in a day or two." The woman took the briefcase from Takashi and as she started to walk off she began to run off with it. It was obvious she only wanted it for herself. After the shocking moment everyone turned around and was in shock. Takashi ran after her and said "Come back you thief!" Takashi tackled her with the help of his bird friends flying him. He then got the briefcase back and the leader of the team came out quickly after. He was an older man and he quickly shook Takashi's hand. "Thank you hooded youngster I thank you for your hard work." Takashi took off his hood and and smiled as he walked away.
RP Sample 2:
Takashi woke up early on a friday morning. The sun was shinning bright and it seemed like the perfect day for an adventure. He grabbed his clothes and his cloak and began to walk out the door. Takashi walked down the street from his apartment where he would meet a pair of twin girls they were seven years young and they were very cute children. The twins went by the names Hana and Aona Tatsume. Twins had a special place in his heart as he himself was a twin. He travelled about 12 blocks down the street in order to get to the park for his baby sitting and playtime mission. When he arrived at the park the girls were there with their mother. Takashi walked over to the happy family and removed his hood. He smiled at them and said "Hi im Takashi Shinkiro from Infinity Hydra im here to watch our daughters while you go out ma'am." The mother was very pleased and smiled at him and then turned to her girls. "Ok dears listen to what Mr. Shinkiro says and be good." Arina said as she smiled at the girls. Both daughters smiled and replied to their mother in unison saying "Ok mommy have fun and we love you." The mother then left the girls with Takashi and the trio began to play with each other. Takashi pushed the girls on the swings, pushed them down the slide, and playfully threw them into the air. After about an hour of playing Takashi and the girls stopped and decided to go for ice cream. As they were leaving the park it was nobody around and it was strangley quiet. Suddenly a gust of win blew and the girls held onto Takashi as if their life was at risk. Suddenly 2 armed and masked kidnappers knocked Takashi in the back of the head with a brick. Takashi was soon knocked out and the girls turned around and screamed. They were grabbed up and had bags put other their heads and were sealed inside a magic jar. The girls were then taken away while Takashi remain knocked out on the ground.After about 3 or so hours Takashi woke up and felt like a complete failure. *Fuck my life I lost the kids* He thought to himself. After he got up off the ground he began a city wide search for the girls. He searched almost every building and side street. He then found one of the girl's shoes, this meant that he couldnt be too far off from where they were. Suddenly one man comes from the corner and says "You shouldn't be here kid I don't wanna kill you." Suddenly the man remembered who Takashi was and went in for an attack. Takashi barely dodged the man's first punch . And the punch failed to land the man called out to his partner. Takashi soon took of his cloak and it blew away with the wind. Takashi then began to have a massive fist and kick clash with the first man. Every other hit had landed and the other hits missed or were blocked. It only took about 15 seconds before the first man got tired and Takashi took use of that and landed a Fist of the phoenix on the man's face which bruised his jaw in about 5 different places. After landing a massive punch to the jaw Takashi landed a left hook to the man's temple which successfully knocked him out. Takashi was also very tired from this brawl also but he still had to deal with one more bad guy. Takashi was heavily breathing, and found it hard to stand. As he fell to his knees the man came up and kicked him in the jaw and spat on him. Takashi laughed as the man did this and he looked down to him and said "Kid whats so funny im beating your ass right now" Takashi continued to laugh and replied with "I don't care I have dealt with worse emotional pain than this bullshit. As long as the girls are ok I will survive because one day I wanna see them as wizards and I will be there guildmaster." Takashi then got up off the ground and took several steps back. He then went to begin his phoenix peck spell. After Takashi fell to the ground he realized the man was barely injured. The kidnapper laughed but let his guard down. He took this in to good use and ran at the man with lightning speeds and sent a right punch to his left jaw and a left punch to his stomach. The man then went a few feet into the air and coughed up blood. It was then an almost decided fight but Takashi still had plans for the kidnapper. "Where the hell are those girls!" Takash said with a mad face and bloody lips. The kidnapper gave him no response but instead looked at a nearby dumpster. Takashi said "Thanks but next time open your mouth but you really pissed me off so there is no next time for you. Look at the brightside your friend gets to live."Takashi then snapped the man's neck and let his body hit the ground with a very loud thud. After the battle Takashi grabbed his cloak off the ground and put it on his shoulder and recovered the magic jar from the trashcan. He smashed the jar and the girls came pouring out along with at least 3 other sets of twins. Takashi was in shock and was glad about what he did to the men after seeing this. He then saw Hana and Aona and grabbed them up off the ground and hugged them. The girls yelled excitedly in unison "Mr. Takashi you saved us" Takashi blushed and smiled a bit and said "Of course I came" He then put the girls on his shoulders and looked at all the other twins and said "Ok look everyone follown me and I will take you all home" After spending about a hour taking all the kids home except Hana and Aona Takashi then went to there house where their mother would be waiting for them. Takashi was very scared as he didnt want to tell the girls mom what happened but he had to. He walked with the girls back to their house when suddenly a man from the magic council appeared. He looked at Takashi and said "Sir thank you so much on behalf of the MC we have a sack of 2,000 jewels for you. You will be a fine and powerful wizard I know it." The man handed the jewels to Takashi and ran off. Takashi and the girls looked confused but Takashi still yelled thank you. After he got the girls home Takashi explained what happened and the mother was of course mad. But she was happier he got them back and paid him as expected. He left the girls with a picture and a note, it was a picture of him and the note was telling them to never give up. Takashi left their house and began to travel home, as today was a very tiring day. As he was walking away from the house the mother came running towards him and said "You know this morning I thought you were a weirdo with a hood but you know now I think you are a hero. You will make a good father one day." Takashi smiled but was taken by surprised when the woman kissed him. He blushed as him and the woman both walked off. Takashi would probably never see them again but he still enjoyed having met them.


Last edited by Takashi Shinkiro on Fri Nov 22, 2013 1:02 pm; edited 3 times in total

Takashi Shinkiro


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Re: Takashi Shinkiro(Done)

Post by Darion Steinheil on Thu Nov 21, 2013 3:44 am

Going to give it a proper review tomorrow so just going to point out three things real quick.

1: No, you cannot say your character is friends with another in History, unless the other person has approved it.

2: So...The spell would make someone lose their magic, and then some mysterious way they came back? What..

3: ...S-rank mage at the age of 14? Yeah, that is a No with capital N from me.
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Darion Steinheil


You dare challenge the Magic Council?
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Re: Takashi Shinkiro(Done)

Post by Ganz on Thu Nov 21, 2013 5:50 am

I'll be taking over the review now. I'll do this elaborate and tell you exactly why this app would get a maximum of B Rank approved. (Yes, ranks in this case are the equivalent of app quality.) I advise to read the following completely and closely so you have an idea what I want to see and why I'm criticising what I criticize. Grammar and spelling may not always be perfect and I apologize. So here goes:

To start off with appearance. I'll be straight: It doesn't even nearly suffice in terms of depth. It doesn't hit any sort of depth at all. I have no sort of visual picture in front of my eyes reading your description. In case you want him to looks just like your fc, you can STILL make his appearance deep. Because what we see on Ichigo's pics is probably not close to what he really looks like. When reading your appearance I want to basically be able to create an exact picture of your character in front of my eyes. I want to know if what body parts are important to him. I want to know if he cares about his outer appearance, if he's a lazy slackey that just lets himself go. I want to know about his facial expression and his gestures. I want to know about his posture and how he walks. I want to know WHY he does all of that. I want to know about his clothing style (I hardly doubt anybody only has two outfits). What you're creating here is a character, but I want him to be a person next to just a playable character. And that starts with his appearance. If I get a small appearance then I will not nearly have a good enough image in front of my inner eye to visualize the rest of his characteristics. Try answering this question:

If you went to a police station and someone asked you how Takashi would look (and you would have to describe him in detail because it's about life and death or whatever), how would you describe him? Any specifics, clothes, posture, body quirks or similiar. What about his appearance is important to him? Is he self-conscious with anything (why would he be?), doesn't he care (why doesn't he care if that's the case) or is he a narcissist (also here, why is he that). Go into detail about EVERY little thing that defines your character's appearance.

PS: In case your character is supposed to be an exact copy of Ichigo without ANY alterations, that'd be uncreative and not get you an S Rank spot. Just saiyan.

Now, for likes and dislikes. I'll start with likes: You answered what exactly is meant by friends and defined his like for friends. But I want to know the extent of this definition. How far would he go? How much of a family are his friends to him? And then why? Why does he love his friends so much? What reason is there for him to care about them? Why does he care at all about having friends? This accounts to everything within the likes and dislikes section. What you did was defined his like briefly, but didn't elaborate on the extent and reasons for the likes. What you are supposed to do is assign these likes to the PERSON Takashi, not the character Takashi, and then psychoanalyse WHY he
has these feelings of affection for the certain things.
Additionally, I could care for a few more likes. Because remember: Takashi is not supposed to be a CHARACTER after I've read this, but a PERSON in mine and your mind. He should have other deep interests that he cares about. What makes him an individual? What kind of quirks does he have? Is he interested in anything specific? Everyone is eventually. What is extremely important to him. All of the likes you gave are quite standard things that anyone would like. Family, friends, a certain kind of food and the stuff he's good at. But what is his SPECIFIC interest that makes him different from others who also like their family, friends, spicy food, magic and swords. Because those are broad fields of interests probably a lot of people and especially mages find interesting.

For dislikes I can only say the EXACT same thing. You can apply everything I've said to likes on dislikes as well. Has undesire for some things and genuine fears that he hates. Losing his family and friends would be a threat to ANYONE. It's normal. "Unlike most males Takashi is in touch with his emotions and can be very heart broken if he loses someone he loves" <<< That btw, extremely unprofessional. "Like most males". You are generalizing others to make your character seem special in some way. But we are INDIVIDUALS, same with CHARACTERS. No two people who are unemotional are exactly the same. No two people who are emotional are exactly the same. Assigning one special character trait to your gender to make your character seem special is not a thing to do. I want to know WHY, HOW and HOW MUCH he would hate it. And then as said: More dislikes. What makes HIM a specific individual.

For Motivation I can only tell you the same thing. This time you scratched the surface, but still are not deep enough. The problem is though once more: That motivation is quite standard. I believe that a lot of mages would want to be strong mages. Just like every soccer player wants to be a good soccer player. Just like every Fighter wants to be a better Fighter. You should understand what I'm getting at. Telling me a bit why he specifically wants to be a wizard saint is a start. But here's the thing: It wasn't even close to deep enough. You need to dig up everything you can surrounding this motivation. Ask yourself why he wants to do that until you think you would know Takashi as a friend and could tell what exactly he wants. "make a guild where everyone can be themselves and form a sort of second family but still be strong and aggressive." Not trying to pop a bubble, but that's basically what Fairy Tail is.

Now to Fears. This would get redundant. You should probably know what I'm going to say. Dig deeper and answer what makes him individual and find out on yourself why your character is different from everyone else. "Takashi likes to flirt with females when he is single and if he gets rejected he is destroyed so therefor he doesn't wanna be rejected" This is an easy way to create linkbacks to stuff you already said. You don't have to repeat what you said, but you can just hint to your likes with a few nice choices of words. For the fear of death: This is the most basic and standard fear any and most every human has. It's basic, it's normal and nothing special. I would recommend you to either take out the fear of death or describe it in so much detail that it becomes really something significant for the understanding of Tsukiya. Otherwise it'd be just unecessary information because anyone who wants to follow his dreams and achieve his goals and grow up is afraid of dying. Heck, even 90 year old people who can barely move are afraid of dying.

Now to personality, I think this'll be a somewhat short paragraph. And I know this sounds harsh but try to take it constructive: It's a boring person if I'm honest with you. What the whole personality told me was this:

He's a lean and relaxed guy but has strong ambitions and a sense of justice. His mind does the working for him and he's a quick thinker. He likes a comfortable meal.

That's what I took away from your personality. If I'm able to cram the stuff into 3 tiny sentences then it's certainly not enough. I want to know about his state-of-mind. His conflicts, what makes him a different person from the rest. Where the contrast of his relaxed behavior but strong set of mind comes from. What kind of position he could take as a leader, if he's a follower, if he is a submissive or dominant persona. If he's extroverted or introverted.
Again, try to psychoanalyse Takashi until you're too exhausted to even think about it anymore.

Now to history. I'll sum up what it tells me again:

He was a cute kid. He liked Fairy Tail. He was a child prodigy. He was a good swordsman. He researched magic because he wanted a special magic for himself. He created magic but lost his powers when using it against some guy. He regained his powers. His father's death made him sad. He strifes around as a mercenary now.

It's missing just about everything to make it a significant history. Your character could stand completely alone without anything in that history happening. The history is missing links between the different events, descriptive crucial points, individuality and also something unique. It's just a family story. A summed up biography of one guy out of the family who's now a mercenary. I want to know how every little important event influenced his life. I want to know what kind of people were important to him. Why they were important to him. Why he was such a child prodigy? What kind of magic he invented? How he defeated the fiend mage of such power (it SHOULD be quite a struggle if I'm honest). How his father died. What his state of mind is, was and how it changed overtime. I know you can't make it perfect and cover every little thing. It's extremely hard and history is always the most complex point because basically THIS is what MADE your character an INDIVIDUAL PERSON. So make it deep. History has to be the deepest part of your character, so try to cover as MUCH as possible. As much why's, how's and extents as possible.

Finally, as my last point I'll go to wording, grammar and spelling. Wording is often repetitive, uncreative and standard. Your app lives from its wording. I want to see some creative writing to your character. Use your creativity to give the reader a special image of what EXACTLY you mean when your character has a bond with someone, or despises something. Your grammar is standard and suffices. Your spelling is still a bit shady and has errors here and there. And check the beginning of your overall personality. It's weird to read and I have no idea what you mean in the first or so sentence. As my last point: DON'T USE ABBREVIATIONS AND OOC STUFF. SS Rank and FT, don't use those. Say a "extremely strong mage" and "Fairy Tail". NO FUCKING ABBREVIATIONS. Those pissed me off quite a bit.

Now try to pay attention to the things I mentioned and edit your app accordingly. Thank you for your attention

- Ganz.
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Re: Takashi Shinkiro(Done)

Post by Takashi Shinkiro on Fri Nov 22, 2013 1:30 pm

Bump

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Re: Takashi Shinkiro(Done)

Post by Alyssia on Thu Dec 12, 2013 5:03 am

Well, factoring in all of the things Ganz said and the fact you made changes which reflect that, I only have one thing to say in response to this: Space it out a little better please.

Pretty much all of the different fears, motivations, likes and paragraphs for the appearence section have no spacing between them and it makes it a little difficult for to read. I'd also like you to put your history and personality into spoilers on account of how long they are.
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Re: Takashi Shinkiro(Done)

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